Memories??

Merriam Webster defines Memories as: the power or process of reproducing or recalling what has been learned and retained especially through associative mechanisms and the storage of things learned and retained from an organism’s activity or experience as evidenced by modification of structure or behavior or by recall and recognition.



I recently heard that it is not “normal” to not remember a lot of events from your childhood. And that if you do not remember a lot, that you have blocked it out of your memory for some reason.

I have never had many memories from growing up. And thinking back on to what very little I can actually remember, the things I do remember, which are very few and far between, are mostly because something bad happened. I remember some good things, but not many.



I was just reading a post that my sister wrote about an adventure we had, that I don’t remember happening. She remembers back when I was really little, probably more than I do.

Things I remember were like walking really far one morning to get to the baby sitter, because the car broke down. Getting yelled at by the baby sitter, getting yelled at by my mom.

I remember when I was in second grade, my brother, sister and I were late to school pretty much every day, because the baby sitter decided she wanted to drop her kids off at school first, even though their school started later than ours. I remember getting yelled at because a crow that had come down the chimney into the house was locked in the den, and I had forgotten and opened the door, and got in trouble. See all of these things aren’t great memories, and are pretty close to the only ones I have for childhood, with the exception of a couple of good memories.



Some people can recall a lot of things about their childhood. I have talked to my hubby about his childhood, and he remembers a whole lot more than I do. He remembers a lot about school and things he did. I cant recall much of anything from elementary, or middle school (besides walking home from school every day), and recall very little from high school, besides mostly not wanting to be there.



So it leaves me to wonder several things, like

1) Is the little bit that I remember actually “normal”?

2) If it is not normal, then why am I repressing so many memories?

3) What would be the cause of the repressed memories?



I know I am not what is described as “Normal” and I have no desire to be. I have no desire to fit in, and I would rather be happy with me, and have my family be happy with me, then to try to fit in. Its not logical to try to please everyone else, and to still remain true to yourself.

There is a saying:

“To thine own self be true”

And if you go around trying to please everyone else, or trying to fit in, then you aren’t being true to yourself.

Maybe I am not being logical thinking that way, but it doesn’t really matter. I know what and who I am, and I know the way I think, and whether or not what I am thinking may be detrimental or just hurtful to anyone. And for the most part it isn’t.

The only part of my personality that is hurtful to people is the fact that I am pretty blunt. I usually say what I am thinking, and tell people how I feel about any and everything. But usually I am also very shy, unless I do have something to say. Then I don’t beat around the bush.


Anyway, whether or not I remember as many things as the “average normal” person, isn’t much of a factor to me, but it does make me wonder a little why I don’t remember as much as “most” people do.